Today was my last chemo treatment. Yay! I can hardly believe it. The nurses at CARTI in NLR are angels. I’m so thankful for them. They are so kind and happy. Willing to listen, if a patient needs to talk. Willing to talk, if a patient needs to be distracted. Wonderful people. Incredible nurses.
On this last day of my chemo treatment, a new fear grabbed me. I have had some fearful times. I’ve been on a path I didn’t choose. I can’t see around the bend. But God has been with me. He has not left me. He has placed people in my life who have shown me his love and care. He has calmed many fears. But I faced a new fear today.
“I would think that you would be different after going through something like this,“ said one of my nurses as she was removing my IV for the last time and getting me all bandaged up. I said, “Well, I sure hope so.”
The more I thought about what she said, the more I wondered if I was different. Have I been changed by God’s great mercies through this experience? Or am I pretty much the same.
How I hope and pray that he is changing me.
One of my greatest fears is that I come out of this experience and I won’t be changed. I’ll just be the same ole fraidy cat. Riddled with worry and apt to miss God’s mercies dancing around me. But you know what? God has been faithful in every way during this scary time. He has supplied my every need. (Philippians 4:19) I am confident that he will be faithful in changing me. He is transforming me every day into the likeness of Jesus. I can rest assured that God is continuing his work in me. (Philippians 1:6) And there is much work to be done!
I want to be like the weaned child in Psalm 131 who is content sitting on his mother’s lap. Concerned about nothing. Completely trusting in the love of his mother.
It doesn’t take calamity or disease to be changed into the likeness of Jesus. It just takes a heart turned towards him. It takes an unveiling of our faces. God does the work, we simply submit our lives to his glory. (2 Corinthians 3:18)
As the words of the hymn say, ‘Turn your eyes upon Jesus, look full in His wonderful face, and the things of earth will grow strangely dim in the light of His glory and grace’. Now that’s a change. “The things of earth will grow strangely dim.” The cares and worries of this world take their rightful place in importance when I look full in his wonderful face.
I praise God for his work in me and for his work in all of us. He is changing all of us who have our faces turned towards him.
I hope you have a wonderful day!